Snarking! The Grammys

I'm going to enjoy the show tonight, but I can't help but to comment on a few moments along the way.

1. X-Tina obviously thought she had something to prove in the opening tribute to Aretha. Yes, we know you can sing. But can you sing without warbling like a dying cockatoo?

2. Love her or hate her, Lady Gaga knows how to stir the pot. And I can't help but think as I watch her Vogue her way through Born This Way, that I'm watching history being made - an artist kids will idol just like we did with Madonna. However, because Gaga stated her performance would be out of this world, I have to say it was a bit ordinary. The egg was nothing more than a prop used to ignite Twitter. And it did. Mission accomplished!

3. Was it a requirement that a gay man introduce Lady Gaga? No matter, I heart you Ricky Martin. Not so much the silver pants however.

4. Will Gaga be upset that Bruno Mars and Janelle get a standing ovation and she didn't? I'm sure she's thinking it!

5. Leann Rimes is still making music? If I had Eddie at home waiting, I sure wouldn't be.

6. Usher is quite the performer. Maybe next time his costume designer should give him shades that stay on his face. Doh! Another standing ovation! Poor Gaga.

7. Oh, this is how it works. Bieber sits down to sing live and to show the world he doesn't always lip sync. As soon as he's required to dance, cue vocal track.

8. Whitney Houston singing Born This Way? Really? Gaga couldn't imagine herself as a superstar singing the song when she wrote it? Really? You just wrote it last year. You were the biggest act on the planet. Sometimes, I question her rhetoric. Best related Tweet: "Aww... Lady Gaga thanked Whitney Houston! I bet Whitney was excited. I hope she CRACKed a smile."

9. Lea Michelle from Glee couldn't speak her lines. Were you nervous to be hangin' next to the big football star? Who was he again?

10. Cee-Lo, Gwyneth and the Muppets are game changers.

11. Noteworthy Tweet: Age old question finally answered: The egg comes before the chicken - at least on the Grammys.

12. Katy Perry did quite the good job. Goes to show you don't need to dress like a Muppet to succeed.

13. I think it's time for Keith to cut his hair. I'm sure some say the same about mine. :)

14. Lady Antebellum wins Song of the Year. At least now I can identify them in a crowd. Two years ago in Vegas, they stood in front of us and we all were like, "Who are they?"

15. Poor Miley. Though, Seth, that might have been a little too soon.

16. I'm guessing Eminem and Rihanna will get a standing ovation. Again, poor Gaga. Though, I'm not an Eminem fan. He's a screamer. I mean, his head is going to explode.

17. Bieber lost the Best New Artist to Esperanza Spalding. Bieber was like, "Who the hell is she? Don't they know my movie made over $30M this weekend!" That's okay Bieber. You avoided the New Artist curse.

18. Noteworthy Tweet: "WHY HASN'T WILLOW SMITH WON ANY GRAMMYS?"

19. Oh, that's what Esperanza does. She plays the cello.

20. Oh my God. Mick Jagger is skinny with a giant head. Eat a sandwich already.

21. Noteworthy Tweet: "Is there some significance to Mick Jagger showing up right after the dead person montage?"

22. People in the audience were just standing there, staring at Mick Jagger. Yes everyone, he's still breathing.

23. Who's living under Barbra's dress? The little hairdressers who gave her those hair extensions?

24. Hopefully someone tall sat behind Nikki Minaj.

25. Good thing Eminem dressed up for the event.

26. I'm thinking Rihanna's bonfire is a fire hazard.

27. Sounds like Rihanna is thankful for auto-tuning.

28. It's 10:15, three hours into the show, and now I can officially say, "I'm bored." Talk about ending on a low note.

29. Arcade Fire wins for Album of the Year? Well, again, talk about ending the show on a low note. Good for them, but I could care less.

30. Awkward ending to the show. It's like nobody knew when to cut the power. Do it already. Those famous people have been sitting for over three hours!

31. Goodnight everyone!